Impractical Jokers' Sal Explains Why He Kept A Frozen Pet Fish For Over Three Years

"Judge not, lest ye be judged." That's an important lesson in any situation and especially poignant now. Who among us has never picked up the husk of a lifeless pet, placed it gingerly in the freezer where our food is stored, and then left it there for longer than it takes to gestate an African elephant? These things happen. There's no point making a fuss.

Sal Vulcano from "Impractical Jokers" can back us up on this. The beloved TruTV prankster has been around the block a time or two, and he's frozen his fair share of household pets. It's normal. If anyone is being weird here, it's you.

A while back, it came to light on the show that Vulcano had been keeping the frosted corpse of a pet fish in his freezer. Peculiar enough on its own, the details really brought the situation to life — it turned out that the fish had been occupying said freezer for more than three years. And so, in a judgment-free, utterly emotionless state of curiosity, many viewers began to wonder, you know, like, "what?"

Well, it's a funny story.

In November of 2014, Sal Vulcano addressed the Walt-Disney-freezing of his former pet on an episode of the "Impractical Jokers" web series "After Party Web Chat."

Like many arguably disturbing stories, this one begins at a carnival. "My niece threw a ping pong ball in a little fish thing, and she won a fish. It was a five-cent fish," the funnyman explained, "and she brought it home, and my sister throws it in a salad bowl and starts feeding it Wonder Bread."

Though fortified with vitamins to help young Americans grow strong, Wonder Bread is not famous for its capacity to keep fish alive. Vulcano continued: "I knew it was gonna meet its demise, so I said, 'you can't do this.'" The television star went on to state that he purchased all the accouterments to keep a fish alive — he must have picked good ones, too, since it apparently kept doing fish stuff like a little champion for the next seven years.

It is a sad fact that all things must, in their own time, pass into the great beyond, and Vulcano's fish was no exception. "The fish died," he continued. "I didn't want to flush the fish because that's disrespectful. I'm not some mean old blue hair. So I put the fish in my freezer, and I wrapped it so I could bury it in my yard, except it was the summertime when I did it, and I didn't want to do it at that time because I didn't want it to decompose and smell or whatever." Fair enough.

But what happened next? Pretty shocking stuff, that's what.

Sal Vulcano left the fish in the freezer. That's what happened next, and it was wrong of us to imply that it was something more astonishing than that.

"And so then I kinda, like, just forgot about it in a way, and it's been in my freezer for three and a half years. So, it's fine. It's wrapped. I'm not really looking for you to judge me. It's there right now." He went on to explain that, at the time of the recording, he would probably move soon and that maybe he'd bury the fish before he left. Feel that? That's closure. It feels good.

Except it isn't, and it doesn't, and in 2021, Vulcano appeared on the Hey Babe Podcast and talked about the fish some more, and you know what? He still had it. That fish was still in his freezer. By his estimation, he'd had it in there for around eight years.

But again, we're not here to judge. Nobody, not one person, is here to judge.