The Best Phil Dunphy Moments On Modern Family

When you think of Modern Family, you think of Phil Dunphy. Of course, you also think of the show's creative family structures and its exploration of intersecting values, lifestyles, and personal histories, depicted with humor and affection. But be honest: At some point shortly before or after you reflect upon the show's depth, you think about Phil. 

Now, Phil isn't the first name that comes to mind in terms of character development — but look closer, and you'll find an understated depth to Phil's contentment with exactly who he is. This is not to say that Phil doesn't move forward over the course of the show: He works hard to cultivate connections with his children and make his wife feel cared for, even if he doesn't always pick the most practical or successful ways of doing so. Fundamentally, however, when it comes to Phil, what you see is what you get. He encapsulates the quiet profundity of doing your best and believing doggedly in what's possible (and a little bit of what's impossible, or at least ill-advised). His repeated failures and gaffes aren't just comic relief, but evidence of his optimism, which ultimately holds his family together. We're here to celebrate that steadfast kindness with this list of Phil Dunphy's best moments.

Phil's-osophy, "a hard-bound collection of all the lessons [he's] learned," featured prominently in the episode "Schooled," is just about all you need to get through life. Not because this self-published volume is filled with wisdom, but because it will make you laugh, make you think, and remind you not to take any of it too seriously.

Phil's-osophy manages to do all of this without any sort of contrived drama. You don't have to wonder what sordid backstory illuminated these "deep truths about life," because it's pretty obvious that most of them probably just popped into his head at random. Consider this nugget of truth, courtesy of Phil's-osophy: When life gives you lemonade, make lemons so that life will be like, "Whaaaat?"

Goofy? Yes. But Phil's-osophy also offers some surprisingly ingenious solutions to life's problems. Phil notes that you should always look people in the eye, but recognizes a serious roadblock to that tenet: What if the person is blind? You should still look them in the eye, Phil explains. To achieve the desired effect, simply say, "I'm looking you in the eye." Now that's one to grow on.

Phil refers to himself as a "cool dad" (that's his "thang"), but the thermometer swings to hot hubby when he appears as Clive Bixby, his sensual alter ego. Bixby is a successful businessman who designs high-end electro-acoustic transducers. Phil himself consistently demonstrates an interest in technology and inventiveness, and shares Bixby's tendency to stray into unintentional innuendos while trying to be cool. In Phil's mind, however, Bixby's coolness is rarely compromised, no matter what kind of awkward situation he ends up in.

Phil created Bixby to go on Valentine's dates with Claire as Julianna, a bored housewife with a dark side. Their attempts at role play are often foiled, however. The first time Bixby introduces himself, Claire loses her coat (under which she has removed all of her clothes in an attempt at spicing up the seduction) on an escalator. The next time, a mix-up causes Phil to narrowly avoid arrest after greeting an old woman in her hotel room naked among scattered rose petals — a gesture meant for Claire. Despite all this, or perhaps because of it, Bixby and Julianna's adventures still make for a sweet expression of love — and a tribute to the raw magnetism of speaker salesmen.

Phil states in the episode "Fizbo" that he has a complicated relationship with clowns — and this comes from an episode from 2009, way before the mystifying rash of clown sightings in 2016! Phil's aversion to Fizbo the clown does offer him the chance to bond with Mitch: Mitch overhears Phil whispering to himself, "It's just Cam, it's just Cam," in an attempt to soothe his anxiety over the presence of the clown. Mitch empathizes with Phil's discomfort, saying that he, too, has a "complicated relationship" with Fizbo — more specifically, with Cam as Fizbo. 

Fizbo repeatedly denies any knowledge of someone named Cam, which only feeds Phil's pathological fear. To make things worse, he later plays a part in the disastrous events of the episode's party, further traumatizing Phil. This episode serves the narrative that Phil is essentially a big kid. But he really tries to grow up, attempting an "exposure therapy" of sorts by dressing up as Fizbo himself, to confront his fear head-on. It doesn't go well.

While Phil's relationship with his father-in-law may be strained, the two do share a few begrudgingly heartfelt moments on their path to an amicable relationship. One of the best is from "Snip," when Jay has to chase after Phil when he runs away from his vasectomy, having seen someone else's operation take a less-than-stellar turn.

Phil appears to be worried about not being a "real man." Jay thinks Phil is referring to the emasculation of getting the vasectomy itself. Really, though, Phil is talking about his fear of the pain of the vasectomy, worrying that his anxiety means he's a wimp. In a not-exactly-tender but still sort of touching moment, Jay reassures him. This is all set off by a great visual gag: Phil sits down on a bench bearing one of his advertisements, but the way his torso covers up some of the letters makes it seem like the ad says "not a real man."

If Phil had an official catchphrase, "oh no" would be a strong contender for the title. You might expect to hear it more from other family members about Phil: He's so happy-go-lucky and optimistic that he's often unaware of his own blunders. But we see him get impatient from time to time, or find himself "up a tree" due to one or another ill-fated exploits.

Consider the time Phil forgets how to walk and gets stuck on an escalator in "The Old Man and the Tree." Some of Phil's best "oh no" moments come from this episode, in which he has to stair-walk the distance to Canada in order to keep the Stairmaster in the bedroom. He completes the challenge, but as a result, forgets how to walk normally. The problem escalates when he begins to walk up a broken escalator and it then starts up again. "Oh no" is putting it mildly. Consider also the season two episode "Chirp," in which the smoke alarm in the house keeps beeping, and Phil can't figure out the source of the sound. He utters a frustrated "oh no" every time it happens.

This toast is a moment of quiet, bittersweet understanding and vulnerability between Phil and his father-in-law. It's also an awesome example of Phil's character development. True to his values, his maturation is most evident in his relationships with others rather than in personal revelations and triumphs. His connections with his family are what he holds most dear and puts the most effort into.

Throughout this episode, Phil has attempted to prove his ability to take care of everything in a crisis in an effort to present himself as a "real man." While his overcompensation, as usual, makes things worse rather than better, Gloria points out that his particular strength is in making people feel comfortable around him and allowing them the space to open up. Later in the episode, Jay does just that, admitting to Phil that one of his Navy friends has passed away and he's upset about missing a toast in his old comrade's honor due to the storm. Phil pours Jay a shot in silence and turns to leave, but Jay calls him back for a second drink, reaffirming Phil's character as a presence you'd like to have around in a crisis — not to fix things, but to comfort you when things can't be fixed.

One of Phil's best "osophies" is the assurance that the most amazing thing that can happen to a human will happen to you ... if you just lower your expectations. At first, this adage appears to be a bit of a bleak take on life. It makes it seem like you are cursed to accept less than what you really want and will never know true satisfaction. He can also be heard counseling people to "marry someone who looks sexy disappointed." What a bummer.

But really, it's also kind of sweet. The most magical part of this is that Phil doesn't even think to consider a morose interpretation. All he can see is the endless possibility for happiness that exists in every moment, as long as you don't ask too much of it and just allow it to be as it is. This is, in fact, a pretty wholesome reflection of his ability to make both the best and the worst of any situation. And if you think about it, applying this philosophy to our understanding of human beings is what allows us to love Phil as much as we do. He keeps our expectations low and manages to constantly, in one way or another, amaze us.

Ever the innovator in the face of an obstacle, Phil hovers around the house on a roving screen in "American Skyper" because he can't be there for Alex's graduation. It's pretty fitting, because he's always had an affinity for technology ... even if tends to be a love-hate relationship. He may not know all the texting lingo ("wtf" doesn't mean "why the face," unfortunately, but it's very on-brand for someone who seeks to uplift everyone he can and doesn't see the point in getting down) but he sure is eager to try the latest thing regardless.

Behold Phil's wish list, after Claire tells him he's impossible to shop for: Robot dog, night vision goggles, bug vacuum, GPS watch, and speakers that look like rocks. Not a single non-electronic item on the list. With his acrobatic background and technological affinities, in another life, he might have been Batman. His comment on a new Apple product says it best: "The iPad comes out on my actual birthday. It's like Steve Jobs and God got together to say, 'We love you, Phil.'"

Phil chasing after Haley in "Party Crasher," after their relationship has become strained, is an incredibly sweet moment that showcases yet another area of growth for Phil. As much as he wants to be a "cool dad," he is always going to want what's best for his daughters more. Sometimes his love for his family can get in the way of actually sharing that love with them, especially when it manifests as being protective or disappointed.

Here, though, Haley opens up to her mother about how she can tell, every time she sees his face, how much of a disappointment she is to him. At that moment, Phil arrives after chasing her and the boyfriend he detests. Without seeing her, he launches into a tirade about how she is his little girl and no guy will ever be good enough for her, and in one moment, by virtue of his pure intentions and unadulterated emotional honesty, he breaks down a barrier that has caused hurt in their relationship for a long time. Normally, the things he does on accident are goofy and awkward. But while being genuine, sensitive, and a little naive make him anything but a "cool dad," they are ultimately what makes him a great one.

Phil often reminds us that, for all his flaws, he's a great example of an emotionally involved father. It's something that's very important to him: "I always felt bad for people with emotionally distant fathers," Phil muses in "Travels with Scout," "Turns out I'm one of them. It's a miracle I didn't end up a stripper."

It's a funny thing to imagine, but consider: He probably would have been pretty good at it, given his penchant for acrobatics and his performative personality. Not to mention his comfort with stereotypically feminine behaviors and activities.

But Phil is, in the end, a far cry from a stripper — though maybe Clive Bixby could pull it off as a weekend gig, Magic Mike style. Neither Phil nor his kids are perfect, but he's a simple, loving, goofy guy and a quintessential dad. He doesn't let anything define his role as a father except the wholehearted, if sometimes misguided efforts he makes day in and day out.

Phil's masculinity is constantly called into question, usually by Jay's not-totally-friendly joking, but also by his wife, family members, and even himself. He notes, however, that he's seen Ghostbusters "like, seven times" and regularly drives through "neighborhoods that have only recently been gentrified." Through Phil's eyes, we see how innocently microscopic someone's worldview can be. But Phil isn't totally blind — even if he may make an insensitive comment now and then.

Phil is the definition of "off in your own world," because his world is the place that makes sense to him. In his world, you can be a cheerleader who's also a capable husband and a "cool dad." You can invent anything and attempt anything. You can love your children to the best of your ability and have it be enough. And you can watch Ghostbusters whenever you want without batting an eye. Phil reminds us that bravery comes in many forms, and they are unique to the person and the situation.

Yet again, we see Phil inventing a learning tool that goes above and beyond what anyone might expect. He takes it upon himself to come up with not only the ABCs of real estate, all the way through Z. Well, sort of — he claims that he always forgets what X stands for, but maybe he never came up with it to begin with. Or maybe he's full of surprises and knows some obscure Scrabble "X" words.

Whether he's an expert scholar or not, a compilation of Phil Dunphy's resources on life and real estate would be a modern-day library of Alexandria. That might be over-selling it, but then, he's in the business of sales. And he owes all of his success to his commitment to Always Be Closing ... Don't Ever Forget, Great Home Ideas Just Keep Lurking, you get the idea. And therein lies another contender for the official slogan of Phil Dunphy: Ideas just keep lurking. Most of them aren't good, but they keep coming, and that's a pretty great approach to life.

Phil is an athlete — but not in the ways one might expect of a dad. He was a cheerleader in college, and it has informed much of his wisdom. You might laugh, but the proof is in the proverbs: His quote about how a pyramid without practice would just be 10 obituaries is surprisingly insightful and genuinely pithy. You can also find Phil in various states of cardio or contortion: He power walks, uses the Shake Weight, and in an especially impressive and very Phil-like moment, is inspired by Man on Wire to walk a tightrope. Doing so also allows him to accidentally (as usual) teach an unspoken lesson to his children about the simple virtues of being yourself. Phil keeps the blood flowing, and he does it in his own way. Who cares if people think he looks silly doing it? He knows being a male cheerleader is cool, and he makes you believe it too.